{"id":176425701,"date":"2013-09-22T03:40:04","date_gmt":"2013-09-22T08:40:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/?p=176425701"},"modified":"2013-09-22T03:40:04","modified_gmt":"2013-09-22T08:40:04","slug":"obit-video-latina-filmmaker-vanessa-libertad-garcia","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/2013\/09\/22\/obit-video-latina-filmmaker-vanessa-libertad-garcia\/","title":{"rendered":"OBIT + VIDEO: Latina Filmmaker Vanessa Libertad Garcia"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Thursday, August 29 2013<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: xx-large;\">Latina Filmmaker <\/span><\/h1>\n<h1><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: xx-large;\">Vanessa Libertad Garcia <\/span><\/h1>\n<h1><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: xx-large;\">Dies at Age 29<\/span><\/h1>\n<div>\n<div id=\"attachment_176425702\" style=\"width: 650px\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\"><a href=\"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Vanessa_Libertad_Garcia.jpg\"><img aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-176425702\" decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"size-full wp-image-176425702\" alt=\"Vanessa Libertad Garcia Photo: BRIT LAUR\u00c9N MANOR\" src=\"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Vanessa_Libertad_Garcia.jpg\" width=\"640\" height=\"420\" srcset=\"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Vanessa_Libertad_Garcia.jpg 640w, http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Vanessa_Libertad_Garcia-300x196.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-176425702\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: small;\"><em><strong>Vanessa Libertad Garcia Photo: BRIT LAUR\u00c9N MANOR<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\"><strong>by\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/colorlines.com\/archives\/author\/von-diaz\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Von Diaz<\/span><\/a><\/strong><\/span><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">A promising young filmmaker and author, Vanessa Libertad Garcia\u2019s untimely death is just coming to light for many in the entertainment industry. She took her life on August 17, and in\u00a0what seems a growing trend posted her\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/vanessalibertadgarcia.com\/all-my-love-v\/\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">suicide note<\/span><\/a>\u00a0online, saying goodbye to her family and friends on her personal website. Citing a lifetime struggle with depression and self-hate, her\u00a0heartbreaking final letter suggests other factors that drove her to take her life such as body image, family relations, sexuality, substance abuse, and pressure to succeed.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">The daughter of Cuban immigrants, Garcia was born and raised in Los Angeles. She was an out lesbian, and her queer Latina identity\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.curvemag.com\/Curve-Magazine\/Web-Articles-2012\/This-is-What-a-Lesbian-Looks-Like-Vanessa-Libertad-Garcia\/\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">inspired<\/span><\/a>\u00a0much of her work. Already she had amassed an impressive portfolio, including being an associate producer for the award-winning PBS series \u201c<a href=\"http:\/\/www.pbs.org\/independentlens\/maidinamerica\/\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Maid in America<\/span><\/a>\u201d about women domestic workers and\u00a0self-publishing a book of poems and short-stories titled\u00a0\u201d<a href=\"http:\/\/vanessalibertadgarcia.com\/portfolio-item\/voting-booth-after-dark-despicable-embarrasing-repulsive\/\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">The Voting Booth After Dark: Despicable, Embarrassing, Repulsive<\/span><\/a>.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">There has been an outpouring of\u00a0condolences and support from\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/julieershadi.com\/2013\/08\/19\/vanessa-libertad-garcia\/\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">friends<\/span><\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/nalip.org\/spotlight.php?id=337\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">colleagues<\/span><\/a>\u00a0over the past week. Garcia left a number of projects behind, including an upcoming book of poetry called \u201c<a href=\"http:\/\/vanessalibertadgarcia.com\/portfolio-item\/bloody-fucking-hell-book-in-development\/\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Bloody Fucking Hell<\/span><\/a><em>\u201d\u00a0<\/em>and the film \u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/GoodMourningLucille\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Good Mourning Lucille<\/span><\/a>\u201d set for screening in January 2014, as well as a script for a new project titled \u201c<a href=\"http:\/\/blogs.indiewire.com\/sydneylevine\/latinobuzz-filmmaker-vanessa-libertad-garcias-last-blog-post-says-goodbye-to-family-friends\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Dear Dios<\/span><\/a>.\u201d Garcia\u2019s tragically short life speaks to the experiences of many young queer people and immigrants, who so often struggle with\u00a0identity\u00a0and mental health.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">&gt;via:\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/colorlines.com\/archives\/2013\/08\/latina_filmmaker_vanessa_libertad_garcia_dies_at_age_29.html\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/colorlines.com\/archives\/2013\/08\/latina_filmmaker_vanessa_libertad_garcia_dies_at_age_29.html<br \/>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: large;\"><strong>__________________________<\/strong><\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<p><b><iframe width=\"640\" height=\"480\" src=\"\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/q7H97Bvn6To?rel=0\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/b><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: large;\"><strong><span style=\"color: #000000;\">__________________________<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: xx-large;\"><strong><a title=\"All My Love, V\" href=\"http:\/\/vanessalibertadgarcia.com\/all-my-love-v\/\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">All My Love, V<\/span><\/a><\/strong><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\"><strong>By\u00a0<a title=\"Posts by fiatlibertadco\" href=\"http:\/\/vanessalibertadgarcia.com\/author\/fiatlibertadco\/\" rel=\"author\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">fiatlibertadco<\/span><\/a><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/vanessa-02.png\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-176425703\" alt=\"vanessa 02\" src=\"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/vanessa-02.png\" width=\"320\" height=\"320\" srcset=\"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/vanessa-02.png 320w, http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/vanessa-02-150x150.png 150w, http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/vanessa-02-300x300.png 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 320px) 100vw, 320px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">How does one begin, expand upon and then end the last letter they\u2019re ever going to write?<\/span><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Who knows!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">At this point, who cares?\u00a0 I\u2019m about to die, after all.\u00a0 If there\u2019s ever a time in life to toss perfectionism to the wind, I guess it\u2019s now.\u00a0 I\u2019ll just be as honest and vulnerable as possible.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">In the spirit of the modern age, I\u2019ve decided to post my suicide letter as my final blog post.\u00a0 I don\u2019t really know why other people have chosen to leave behind suicide letters.\u00a0 In my case, I\u2019m writing one just to offer a little clarity on why I\u2019ve decided to take this route out of existence instead of peacing out the old fashioned way via natural causes, car accident, plane crash, murder, cancer, etc.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Well, quite simply, I\u2019ve been miserable for a long time. I\u2019d say the chronic melancholia began at age 14 \/ 15.\u00a0 I could blame this state of lingering sorrow and bitter dissatisfaction with myself and my life on anything under the sun: my family, poverty, the capitalist system, sexual abuse, obesity, other people, alcohol, luck, fate, and God \u2026 but that stance would be erroneous.\u00a0 It would merely be a deflection from what I\u2019ve come to know as the true underlying reason of this seemingly unconquerable gloom: Me.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">My inability to adapt to life\u2019s challenges and assimilate its\u2019 lessons into wisdom, gratitude and optimism have left me psychologically torn, emotionally numb, physically exhausted, and spiritually destitute.\u00a0 I do feel, however, that I gave it a damn good try.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Over these last 15 years, I\u2019ve thought to myself, \u201cIf I get good grades, graduate high school, graduate college, struggle for my dreams day and night, lose weight, fall in love, make people laugh, love my friends, show up for my family, dance, travel, get sober, pray, go to therapy, take anti-depressants, swim, read, make movies, write books, smile\u201d \u2026 then I\u2019ll FINALLY be happy.\u00a0 Fuck being happy, maybe I\u2019ll just feel some semblance of peace, contentment, and gratitude.\u00a0 I\u2019d be lying if I said that doing all those things didn\u2019t add profound joy to my existence because they did.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">The Four Experiences I\u2019ll miss most about living:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">1)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Spending time with people I love<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">2)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Creating Art: Namely making movies &amp; writing<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">3)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Experiencing Other People\u2019s Art: Films, Books, Plays, Exhibits, Music, Dance (Especially Flamenco)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">4)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Traveling the world<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">The 1 Experience I\u2019m glad to leave behind:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">1)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Being Me<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Cheesy, Pathetic, and Clich\u00e9, but true.\u00a0 There\u2019s only so many people and movies and beaches you can see before you return to yourself.\u00a0 I LOATHE myself.\u00a0 I am the greatest disappointment of my life on all fronts: professionally, physically, financially, romantically.\u00a0 The chronic melancholia of my teenage years has only grown with time and at this point in my life, it keeps me in a state of complete self-absorption.\u00a0 Self-Pity is my daily and nightly routine.\u00a0 I sleep the days away and when I\u2019m actually conscious I can\u2019t seem to get out of bed, bathe, pay for my car registration. I haven\u2019t been able to enjoy the four experiences listed above for quite a while because I\u2019m acutely aware of my presence at all times.\u00a0 It seems impossible to distract myself from being myself long enough to participate aka fully immerse myself in an enjoyable interaction.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">I feel as though I\u2019m watching from behind a glass shark tank as the world unfolds in all of its majestic glory.\u00a0 I\u2019m just not a part of it anymore.\u00a0 I haven\u2019t belonged to the experience of \u201cliving\u201d for a long time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">In summary, I\u2019m dead already.\u00a0 I have nothing left to contribute.\u00a0 I wish I did.\u00a0 I wish I\u2019d made more of a positive impact and meaningful contribution to society and the planet before I left it.\u00a0 If I had the capacity to do so, I would stay, but I can\u2019t seem to kick this debilitating, crippling, HELLA\u2019 annoying sadness.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">I hope that suicide will offer some relief.\u00a0 If there is no afterlife, then I welcome the peace of nothingness.\u00a0 If there is an afterlife and God does exist, I hope he\u2019ll have mercy on my soul and welcome me to the light.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">All that being said, I\u2019m scared, not so much of dying, but of surviving.\u00a0 YIKES.\u00a0 That would BLOW.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">DO NOT RESUSCITATE, mkay!<\/span><\/p>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">\u00a0\u2014\u2013<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">To My Friends &amp; Family (Past &amp; Present),<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">I leave with absolutely no animosity, anger or resentment toward anyone. I love each and every one of you and will miss you with all of me.\u00a0 Whether we\u2019ve spoken recently or not for many years, you are carved into me and I remember you with deep affection and gratitude.\u00a0 Don\u2019t be too sad though, you know I\u2019ll probably see you guys in about 60 years.\u00a0 Life ends for all of us at some point.<\/span><\/p>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">\u00a0\u2014\u2013<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Wish you all an amazing, memorable, and meaningful stay on the planet!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Remember to Orgasm as much as possible!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Love,<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: medium;\">Vanessa Libertad Garcia<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&gt;via:\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/vanessalibertadgarcia.com\/all-my-love-v\/\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/vanessalibertadgarcia.com\/all-my-love-v\/<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; Thursday, August 29 2013 &nbsp; Latina Filmmaker Vanessa Libertad Garcia Dies at Age 29 by\u00a0Von Diaz A promising young filmmaker and author, Vanessa Libertad Garcia\u2019s untimely death is just coming to light for many in the entertainment industry. She took her life on August 17, and in\u00a0what seems a growing trend posted her\u00a0suicide note\u00a0online, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mo_disable_npp":"","_s2mail":"yes"},"categories":[6],"tags":[4,12,11],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/176425701"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=176425701"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/176425701\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":176425707,"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/176425701\/revisions\/176425707"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=176425701"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=176425701"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kalamu.com\/neogriot\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=176425701"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}